God Laughs: The New Roman Misal

Saint Ursula (week 8/church 9)

Happy Advent!  This morning took me and my crew to St. Ursula's for 10:30 mass.   The first day of the New Roman Misal was okay.  We messed up the first "and with your spirit."  And, in the process, forgot to light the Advent wreath.  I could hang in there as long as the cheat sheet was in my hand, otherwise I was not good at this.  It was also pretty funny to hear people read the red words that direct actions.  (Imagine someone giving a speech and saying "pause for uproarious laughter.") Hey Hilgartner, I notice  His wasn't changed to God's in the new translation.

St. Ursula's is a stone church.  It has two columns of dark wooden pews, red and blue stained glass and cream colored walls.  The crowd ranged in age from babies to grandparents.  The music was again a contemporary group with piano and guitar, mostly using the Gather Comprehensive book.  I think my tambourine joke is falling flat, St. Ursula's has one too.  Today's homily was largely spent discussing the giving tree and adopt a family programs.  At the end of mass, we applauded St. Ursula's newest altar server, who was introduced as someone who would grow up to be the first woman priest.

I can't imagine Advent without the giving tree, so I'll have to figure out how to make that work.  It's not like you can pull a tag at one church and drop it off at the next.

Who was St. Ursula?  (I knew I should have found a copy of Picture Book of the Saints before starting this.)  She was the daughter of a British Christian king who was granted a postponement of marriage that she did not want.  She was later killed by Pagan huns when she refused to marry their chieftain.

Next week looks like St. Joe's Fullerton.

Saint Isaac Jouges

Week 7 (Church 8)

After I had solidly made plans for St. Isaac Jouges, I spent too much time remembering how many times I had seen Black Robe.  Once for sure in 10th grade history class, once more in college as part of Fr. Rossi's film series...what class was that even for?

My attention span at mass yesterday evening wasn't much better as you are about to read.  Mass was both joyfull and fulfilling.  St. Isaac Jouges is a big yellow church with four columns of pews.  (How did I not notice before that so many churches are yellow?)  It was bright with a full crowd, lots of high school kids.  It was noisy.   They used projectors and screens.   I have a general aversion to that.

Gather books!  They were barely used last night. (Am I  turning into one of those people who only know the words to Hear I am Lord and Eagle's Wings?)   Their youth band was great, but I was expecting something different.  No Soon and Very Soon?

This week's homily:  Sin looks like fun, but it really isn't.  (Are you sure?)  Be a person of charity and love.

St. Isaac Jouges has these cool bookmarks in the pews for visitors.  I filled one out and directed them to this blog.  And so ends the liturgical year.  Though we didn't talk about it last night (thankfully) it seems everyone is pretty serious about this New Roman Missal business.

I'm not sure where I am headed next week, but I'll post when I figure it out. Happy Thanksgiving!

Immaculate Heart of Mary

week 6 (church 7)

This week took me to Immaculate Heart of Mary.  And I had company.  Turns out you can take the community on the road with you.  How fun!  And if it weren't for them, I would have been that dork who messes up the communion line.

Immaculate Heart of Mary is another small church with two columns of pews.  It has a pitched roof, stained glass, marble and carpeted floors.  It was full of families with funny kids who dance who in church aisles.  I love ornery kids at church.  I think it's funny.  But secretly I pray that if I am ever so lucky to have kids of my own, I want the ones who work the crowd at the sign of peace.  Not the ones who throw matchbox cars at the altar.

I discovered another red hymnal that I can't remember the name of.  (I should write these things down!  Or look out for red hymnals this year.)  There was also  a book called Choose Christ which I wasn't that into.   We sang City of God and One Bread, One Body. No complaints from me on the music front.  It was a pretty standard piano and guitar combo.  Apparently the tambourine is more popular than I thought.    This mass also offers a sign language interpreter.

This week's homily was about using your talents joyfully and in service of others.  There was some more time spent on the New Roman Missal.  (Please leave the permanent cards in the pews for everyone to use!)  What must Vatican II have been like?

Next week is the feast of Christ the King.  I've had a request for St. Isaac Jogues.  See you Sunday at 5:30.

Frequently Asked Questions

Why are you doing this?
There are plenty of reasons to go to church.  But what I'm missing the most is this protected, quiet hour of the week where everything just seems to make sense.  After that, I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but I'm pretty sure I'll find it.  Weird, huh?

Is this a bet?
No.  No money will exchange hands over this project.  Now if you're talking about my immortal soul...

Do you think this will get you into heaven?
Absolutely not.  At best, I looking at some extended time to think about blogging in purgatory.

Are you only going to Catholic churches?
Yes.  I'm searching for my Catholic identity.  Maybe the blog continues next year.

Is this about meeting men?
No.  How would that even work?

Are you writing a book?
I wasn't planning out it, but it turns out having a blog is fun.  Wouldn't it be awesome if I got an e-mail from America magazine?

Where are you willing to travel to?
Anywhere within reason, likely kept to driving distance.

Do you get a lot of suggestions?
Surprisingly no.  I know a lot of people who are good at ignoring me.   Or who don't go to church either. Or who are just holding out on me.  I want to know what's out there, good, bad or otherwise.  Is there a guilty pleasure church?  A lector who sounds like James Earl Jones? Liturgical dancers?  Tipsters are guaranteed anonymity.

St. Elizabeth's Rockville (week 5/church 6)

I cheated this week.  I went for a sure thing and went to mass at St. Elizabeth’s in Rockville.  I knew it would be on my list of must dos this year.   It was recommended to me andI  haven’t been there since starting this project. 

I stumbled across St E’s when I lived in some near by apartments.  It reminded me a lot of my home parish…down to the brown bricks, back wall of stained glass and across the church seating.  The floor even slants down like it used to in the other brown church.  And the priests who say evening mass have the same names.  How’s that for a doppleganger parish? 

After working night shifts on Saturday nights, I would beeline there, hoping to get there 15 minutes late, go to mass and still get a decent day’s sleep.  There was an older gentleman who was an usher who always insisted on finding me a seat.  That wasn’t the case at some other area churches.  Showing up in scrubs was simply not allowed. 

Anyway, last night did not disappoint.  It was a Life Teen mass.  I don’t remember 6 pm mass being a youth mass before, I’ll have to check out the website. The music was a respectfully rockin’ acoustic guitar.  Today’s message:  I want to go to heaven, but not yet.  Getting to heaven involves being a person of service and forgiveness. 

I'm leaning toward Immaculate Heart of Mary for this weekend, let me know if you are interested.  

Also, I'm working on a list of frequently asked questions for later this week.

Holy Cross Kensington (church 5)

Look at me, going to church on a holy day of obligation.  I heard Only the Good Die Young on the radio on the way to work.  Someone has a little All Saints' Day Humor.  I think that song was played at every Youth Ministry dance I attended.  I don't know if everyone thought that was so funny...

Anyway, Holy Cross was more undiscovered territory for me.  It kind of has the same set up as Immaculate with two sets of pews and has a stained glass/pitched roof vs cinder blocks decor. No seats with obstructed views this time.   And it was cold.  Note to self: wear winter coat from here to Spring.

This was the first quiet mass on the journey.  Or it would have been if it hadn't been for the chatty Cathies and Carls sitting behind me.  Actually, I tend not to mind that sort of thing, but with a crowd of 50, you should be more discrete in your banter.  It was a pleasant night with a message about how being holy is what is expected.

Some of the saints were no saints, right?